nothing going on??
well, no. not exactly. my dad finally sent me an email asking me why there had been no new posts for nearly a month.
my immediate thought was that i’d been way too busy to post what’s going on.
in short, i’m getting re-married in 12 days, trying to help renovate my fiance’s house, getting my son adjusted to a new school, getting active at church, and somehow, through all this, i managed to develop an ulcer. imagine that.
the fabulous unkl pol and i have a saying: ‘we yuens don’t know we’re stressed out until we drop dead of it.’ how true that is. in the last 3 weeks or so, i’d noticed some discomfort growing in my stomach area. it progressively got worse until i could eat nothing without paying for it later…like minutes later…for hours.
as the gnawing pain wasn’t getting better, it was interfering with eating, and waking me up at night, i figured it was time to see the doctor. my symptoms line up with an ulcer…or the early stages of one, so he says. he prescribed some meds which will have to be taken for about 6 weeks and then…we’ll see. if my symptoms don’t get better, i’ll have to see the gut-doctor.
at this point, i’m only 4 days into the treatment, and i’m loading down on the mylanta on top of the acid reducer and my prescription. that’s so i can eat. yesterday, though i was dealing with the side effects of the meds, i wasn’t feeling the pain. i was just plain uncomfortable and not very sociable at church. all i wanted to do was lie down.
great timing. i’ve got a wedding coming up, moving and a host of other stuff that i want to enjoy…and i have this distraction that’s made worse by stress…or pretending i don’t have any.
so therein lies the solution to my problem. how to release the stress? i was talking to BFG–(warren, my soon-to-be husband), and i told him that the solution is easy. it’s the dedication and motivation to follow through. as it is in most cases, pain motivates.
this last 5 years has been rather hellish. it started with a marriage that was ailing badly, moved into discovery of a husband’s infidelity, divorce, moving and healing. the healing wasn’t the hellish part, but it was as active as all the rest. and stressful. healing from the blunt force trauma to a sacred relationship takes years.
but right now, where i am, i am so grateful to the Lord for seeing me through. when i needed Him most, i felt Him there. as i got progressively better, i began getting distracted by my own stuff–my schedule and things to do. and the stress began building again, as did the distance.
so that’s why i told warren that my remedy was take two and call Him in the mornng (yes, i know it’s corny, and syrupy, but it just happened, ok?!). essentially, my stress management boils down to more exercise and more intensive Bible study. those two things do wonders for my stress level. short accounts. it’s so easy to forget what it feels like to have that kind of relationship with God. it’s my own dumb fault, for letting other things get in the way.
and here i am now, dealing with the residual effects of neglect. so. i guess the ulcer (or suspected ulcer) is a constant reminder of keeping a short account. dealing with the crap so i can let it go. this all feels pretty surfacey to me as i explain it…and it is. it’s the first step of recognition. expect more as you watch God work. that’s called hope. hope builds faith.
so dad, there’s plenty happening these days. thanks for asking!